If he does any of these things, get out and get help.
No one plans to enter physically or emotionally abusive relationships.
In fact, many survivors of domestic abuse swear to themselves after they’ve escaped that, now that they know the signs of emotional abuse and potential violence, they’ll never enter another abusive relationship again, only to find the cycle repeating itself with the next man.
A path to a safer, healthier and happier life often starts with a bit of knowledge.
If your partner displays the following behaviors, they may be signs you’re in an abusive relationship:
1. He pushes for quick involvement.
He comes on strong, claiming, “I’ve never felt loved like this before by anyone.”
You get pressured for an exclusive commitment almost immediately.
2. He’s constantly jealous.
Your partner is excessively possessive, calls constantly, or visits unexpectedly.
3. He’s controlling.
He interrogates you intensely about who you talked to and where you were, checks mileage on the car, keeps all the money or asks for receipts, and insists you ask for permission to go anywhere or do anything.
4. He has highly unrealistic expectations.
He expects perfection from you and for you to meet his every need.
5. He’s isolates you.
He tries to cut you off from family and friends, deprives you of a phone or car, or tries to prevent you from holding a job.
6. He blames others for his own mistakes.
The boss, family, you — it’s always someone else’s fault if anything goes wrong.
7. He makes everyone else responsible for his feelings.
The abuser says, “You make me angry” instead of “I’m angry,” or, “I wouldn’t get so pissed off if you wouldn’t…”
8. He’s hypersensitive.
He’s easily insulted and will often rant and rave about injustices that are just part of life.
9. He’s cruel to animals and children.
He kills or punishes animals brutally.
He also may expect children to do things beyond their ability or tease them until they cry.
10. His uses force during sex.
He enjoys throwing you down or holding you down against your will; he finds the idea of rape exciting, not only in fantasy.
He intimidates, manipulates or forces you to engage in unwanted sex acts.
11. He subjects you to verbal abuse.
He constantly criticizes you or says cruel things. He degrades, curses and calls you ugly names.
He will use vulnerable points about your past or current life against you.
12. He insists on rigid gender roles in the relationship.
He expects you to serve, obey and remain at home.